Survivors

Survivors
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  • I am only 18 years old, and I have never been to terrified in my life. In high school, for a very short period of time I was promiscuous and you could say I didn\'t have a lot of self respect. Now, it\'s been almost a year since I\'ve even had sex. Me and my boyfriend are choosing to wait until marriage because that\'s the right thing to do and there are millions of reasons why everyone should - like this for example. For the past couple of months my periods have been heavier, longer, and more painful than they ever were before. I thought nothing of it though. Then I started to experience pelvic pain and what seems like pelvic bloating but I thought I was just getting a little chubby. Then I started having heavy discharge and one day in the shower, while washing myself I started bleeding and it REALLY scared me, so I looked it up and all of my symptoms led to Cervical Cancer. I have a doctor\'s appointment in a week and I am so scared. I have been reading NONSTOP about this disease. I am SO young, and SO afraid of everything and the more I read about how horrific the treatment is, the more traumatized I become. The thought of surgery is chilling to me, I have never even had stitches or broken a bone or anything. I am very high anxiety and every single option for treatment scares the hell out of me. The \"leep procedure\" you\'re supposed to be awake for and they have to give you a shot in your cervix and use an electrical loop to burn you... I feel like I could never bring myself to do that. I\'ve heard terrible stories about radiation damage, and chemotherapy is not only really bad for you with horrible side effects, but I also do not want to lose my hair. I know my health is more important than any cosmetic issue but I am very insecure and my hair is SO long, I couldn\'t imagine losing it. Someone please tell me this could be something else.. or if there are less horrific options for treatment, I don\'t want to be removing my parts either.. I want to have kids someday and I don\'t want to lose my hair. :( Pray for me
  • 02-09 -2012
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