Survivors

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  • Hi, This is a response to Renee who posted today, Oct 20, to Ashley who posted today, and to Priscilla who posted yesterday, Oct 19. I would go further back and respond to everyone else who asked for a response but unfortunately this is not a Forum and I\^m afraid I would get reprimanded for having a 5 page long post :-) I haven\^t checked but this website probably has an area where we can reply back and forth to each other.

    Anyway, Renee, please don\^t worry too much at this point. I know that is easier said than done :-) I had stage 3 severe dysplasia in 2000. The cells were IN the margin but not PAST the margin so it was still classified as dysplasia and not cancer. Thank God. It SOUNDS like you have dysplasia which is PRE-cancerous cells that usually take years to develop into cancer. Please be aware that they cannot definitely know this until further tests are done but that is what it sounds like so far. Did she tell you what stage the abnormal cells were? It would either be CIN1, CIN2, or CIN3 (if it was CIN4 the results would have been worded to you differently). The fact that they used the words \^early stage\^ makes me think CIN1 or CIN2. I, as I mentioned, was CIN3 and even this high stage was highly treatable. But it MUST be treated because with a high risk HPV diagnoses there is a great chance of it progressing to cancer. For now, I would just accept that it is dysplasia until you find out otherwise. I have already said a prayer for you and will continue to do so. I know EXACTLY how you feel :-)

    Ashley,
    I can only imagine how you must feel. My cervical issues did not start until I was 33 (and it was only dysplasia, not cancer) and I had all of the feelings of why is this happening to me? This isn\^t fair, etc... And, the fact is, it\^s NOT fair. But it\^s one of those things that we must, as the Serenity Prayer says, \"accept what we cannot change\". This is NOT to say that we accept that we will ALWAYS have, in this case, cervical cancer. Of course, we will continue to fight for that glorious label of ‘survivor’. It just means that, right now, in this moment, I accept that this is where I am. I know that\^s easier said than done but if we can focus on what we DO have it will be a little easier, I think. Try to be grateful that you have the most important thing of all, your life. And don\^t forget that we live in a time of extremely advanced medical technology where surrogacy is an option for us (expensive, yes, but at your age you could save up for it) and don\^t forget adoption. Can you imagine how good it would feel to take a baby/child out of a life of hell and give it a loving home to grow up in? Try (and pray, if you believe in a God) to rise above the negative feelings and replace them with thoughts of what you DO have. And, on those days when you can’t, just have a good cry and know that tomorrow will be a day you CAN.

    Priscilla,
    Please know that there are SO many other things that your symptoms could be caused from than cervical cancer. I know it’s human nature to think of the worst but I’ve learned that 99% of the time what we worry about never comes to fruition. And, for the 1% that does, well, we’ll have plenty of time to worry about that once it gets here. In addition, it’s not until we experience that 1% that we learn how truly strong we are.

    My best to everyone, Sandy
  • 10-20 -2009
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