Survivors

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  • Hi. I am a mom of two wonderful kids. I had been feeling very tired lately and really wasn\^t sure why. I went to my regular doctor and he said everything was fine. This went on for almost a year. I went to my GYN for my regular check ups and I informed him of how tired I have been and also my periods were so heavy and the blood didn\^t seem like the period blood and that there was an unusual amount of blood clots and the cramps were so horrible and they would start way before my period and after. He did the exams and said everyting is fine to come back in 6 months instead of the year and I said fine. I was still feeling bad, but the doctor said everything is fine and I felt that there has to be something and he gave me a speach about how when a women gets older she changes and that it should just be the scar tissue from my 2 c-sections so I again was convinced. BUT in August I kept feeling so crampy and I went back and he did yet another pap. When I went home one day I saw the letter that changed my life. It was a letter from the doctor to make an appointment as soon as possible as they found abnormal cells in my cervix. I flipped out. I looked at my fiance and just cried. He was so supportive and wonderful (still is). I called the next day and was given an appointment for a week later. He did a biopsy and advised me that I had HPV. I almost fainted. I didn\^t know what to say. I felt dirty and disgusting. ME HOW!! He told me to look it up in the internet I should get pleanty of information there. He wasn\^t very supportive. I had the worst two weeks of my life just waiting to know how bad this would be. I knew I already had the abnormal cells and by the sound of the nurse at my doctor\^s office that was not good. On the week of my appointment, I got a call from the doctor\^s office that he was not going to be in for my appointment. I lost I wasn\^t about to sit there and wait yet another two weeks. They told me they could squeeze me in at 1:00PM (it was alread 12:15PM and I was at work). I just left and he told me I needed to have half my cervix removed as if he was offering me a cup of tea. I decided to have a second oppinion with a doctor that my regular doctor recomended (I have a very good relationship with my doctor and this is the reason I went to him in tears and advised him the situation). This doctor was God sent. He looked over my test results and sat there with me and explained EVERYTHING to me. He said I was in CIN1 and that he would not do surgery, but treatments such a laser or crio. He listened to me and he was upset at the way I was treated by my doctor. He said I had no reason to feel ashamed or dirty or disgusting. He advised me that if I promised to keep up with my treatments and to see him every 3 months, he would stay on as my doctor!! Its only September, but I finally stopped cring and started living my life again. I started planing my wedding agains (I put EVERTHING on hold) and just take everything one day at a time. I have been talkinig to all my female friends and thank God they are getting themselves checked!!! So if I helped just one person, then at least this is worth it!!!
  • 09-17 -2008
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